Statistic

Still at 197. It's the candy. The ice cream. The junk. ick. I don't know what's wrong with me. I know it's all mental, but dang it's hard to get back to eating how I was when I was losing weight. At least the upswing has stopped now.

Food so far today:
Breakfast -
1 can diet coke
2 boiled eggs
1/3 of a small apple fritter donut (I gave the rest away so I wouldn't be tempted to nibble)
5 oz of vitamin water Zero

Lunch -
1/2 cup of punch
1 small plate of stuff from Hometown buffet (basically a spoon or two of a bunch of different stuff, probably equal to about 1 1/2 cups (maybe 2) or so if you stuffed it all in there)
1 piece of cheesecake
1/2 cup of sugar-free/fat-free froYo.

So lunch was about twice as much as I should have had, and the cheesecake was totally unnecessary.

I've only been on my bike once this week. Busy busy. No excuse though. I could be going to the gym at lunch and I'm not doing that either. wtf is wrong with me? I know I don't want to be fat anymore and I know that my clothes are too snug, and I really REALLY don't want to start upsizing my clothes again. Am I going to be a statistic and let my subconscious need to be fat overrule my desire to be the skinny me I know I really am? Am I just whining? I think yes, I am. lol

Oh, also, I got a call from Dr. Maccoll's nurse. They had my test results back for my 1 year check up. I'm doing great on everything, except my cholesterol is slightly above normal. It's 200 I think they said and should be 170-something I think. My good cholesterol was fine. She asked if I was exercising, and I said yes, which is the truth, but I don't think I'm exercising enough. She said that exercise will often help it. She said that I should see my GP about maybe taking something for it or other ways to help it.

Current weight: 197lbs

Grr...

I have no idea how much I weigh right now and frankly I don't care. I had to have all my fluid removed. All of it. They did one of those barium swollows... OMG SO GROSS and some of my bottom stomach was coming up into my top area. Not a full slip, but enough that Dr. Mcoll freaked out. He said I have to be off saline for THREE WHOLE MONTHS. I'm sure I'm gaining some weight, but luckily haven't gained any inches yet. Trying really hard to keep up the exercise and not give in to temptation much on the food/drink area. Staying away from high calorie drinks, except alcohol. I've had some of that lately. Not daily though, or even weekly. Ok, well maybe weekly. For the last 2 months or so. heh.

Still running. I finally did Day 1 Week 4 of the C25k without a fail the other day. I'm supposed to run again today, but I'll be at a party, dancing, so I'll save it for tomorrow.

Sorry about the lack of updates folks. It's hard to feel like talking about it when it's not going so well.

On the NSV side, I'm fitting into several Misses' Medium shirts, and now own a pair of size 12 pants, and my size 14's are getting too big! XD


Current weight: 18_ ?

Exercise!

Went to see Dr. Movassaghi yesterday for my post-op check up on my boobs. All is well. He said they were healing well. While I was standing there with my shirt up he looked at me funny and asked, "Have you lost weight?" too funny. I laughed and told him that I had, and that he should have noticed since he's seen me so often in the last few months. He asked me when I had it done, and I told him June. He asked how much I've lost so far, and I told him 71 pounds. He was very pleased and said I was doing a good job.

When he asked how I was doing it, and I told him about the lapband (again...) he made sure to write down my stats and stuff. Apparently he'd forgotten about the lapband part, cause I had told him about it back when we first started back with the boobs. Either way, he was very pleased with the results. And I reminded him again that in about a year, I'll be coming back to him for the tummy tuck (assuming I can save enough money by then).

I left and when I was driving home I realized that I'd forgotten to ask if it was ok to exercise again! So I called and asked and he said yes, whatever I wanted to do.

YAY!!

So I went home, made a phone call that I had to make, took my asthma meds, changed clothes, stretched and was out the door for a run! Oh it was wonderful. I've missed it. I started right where I left off, Day 2 of Week 3 on the Couch to 5k. Speaking of which, me, my bf, and a few of my friends are doing the 5k here in May! So I gotta keep this up so I'll be able to do the 5k. It seems like such a big goal now, like I'll never be able to run that much, but it's a few months, and I have no more surgeries to impede me from here. So I think I can do it. *crosses fingers*


Current weight: 192lbs.

6 months banded!!

Well, I've been banded for 6 months. I've had my trials and tribulations, some with the band and some without, but here I stand, 65 pounds lighter than I started. I'm down several sizes, from 22/24 to 14/16 in most things. I feel beautiful and free. Free to live life more how I imagined, and free to be more secure in myself.

I'm much happier now than I was when I started. Partly because of the lost weight, and partly because I'm healthier now. I've been exercising, and I can run more than I ever was able to since I was a kid. Maybe even more than I was ever able to AS a kid. It's wonderful.

Because of the weight loss, I found out that more people care than ever before. It's not because I lost the weight, but because now I have courage to ask! I know how they feel because I wasn't scared to step up and say something. They'd cared all along, but because I'd felt so ugly before, I never knew. Looking back now, I see the signs, but I wouldn't have known because I refused to see what was there in front of me.

I love being able to shop in the regular size part of the store. I love it when I have to get rid of an item of clothing because it's too baggy on me now. I love that I'm less afraid of the camera now. I love that I have a future. I love that I can almost fit into my daughter's clothes, and that we'll be able to swap clothes soon! lol

This is the best thing that has happened to me in years. I wouldn't trade it for anything, well, for anything other than not having gotten fat in the first place.

Only 60'ish more pounds to go to my goal. Wish me luck!


Life is good. Thank you to whoever invented the lapband. Thank you.



Current weight: 195lbs.

Not enough fill

I'm back to 200 lbs again. An even 200. I got there on Saturday and was so very excited to see the number. I've been struggling a bit since my last fill to not eat so much, but my band is still pretty wide open. I have an appointment next week to get a fill, it can't come soon enough. Its not like I have no restriction at all, because I do get full faster than if I had no fill. Thing is though, that it's kinda like how I felt after my surgery swelling had gone down, and they gave me my first fill. It was restricted, yes, but I still could eat like, pizza and stuff. I really don't want to be able to eat pizza. It's a trigger food for me. I'll just eat it and eat it till I puke and that's not good. I'd rather not be able to put more than a bite of pizza in my mouth.

Well, at least I'm still losing, albeit slowly. Well, that's all I had for today, I'm off to go play some web games on FB and read some of you ladies' blogs! Have a great one!



Current weight:200 lbs.

Hangin' Steady

I'm at 204. Only a few pounds away from One-derland! But I'm not allowed to exercise, so it feels so far away. I'm only allowed to walk, slowly, for 6 weeks. I'm done with 3 of those, so it's only a little longer. It just feels like it's draaaaaaaaaagging by. I finally have all my drains out. Not sure if I mentioned that already.

I'm looking skinnier. Several people have commented on that in the last week. I'm back in my size 18 jeans. They're a little tight, but not in a gross way. My tops are 14-18, or L-1XL, depending on the style. My neck is looking longer, and that's just awesome. I have on some super big hoop earrings right now, that I couldn't wear before because there wasn't enough space.

I'm not as scared about getting my picture taken, though, now the the fat is coming out, I have to worry about wrinkles more. heh.

So, overall life is ok. I'm still weighing myself daily when possible. I'm also out of old clothes, so once these get too big, I'll have to buy more. I'm ok for now though, since I'm not losing much right now.

Oh, also, on the food front. I'm still having trouble eating. Which is probably why I'm still losing even though I can't exercise. I'm still going to wait till I can exercise though, to tell the docs.


Current weight: 204 lbs

Roller Coaster Ride

Total Pounds Down:

I'm back down again. Just over 5 lbs. lost. I've been avoiding the scales for fear that I would have gained weight but felt I needed to do it this morning and get it over with. I just took a look at my last post and realized that I hadn't updated that the 217 I had been at had only been temporary. I was back down to 212 a few days ago. The 207 is 5 pounds down from even that. So what I thought was going to be a horrible month for weight-loss turned out to be ok. Yay!

I'm still healing from my surgery, and still have tubes in my sides, so typing for extended periods of time is still not cool. This post is short, sorry.

I go in on the 29th to add fluid to my new fake boobs. So, I'll gain weight there, but not real weight. lol Fluid, not fat.

Oh, and I didn't go back to work Thursday. I'll be there Monday though.

Current weight: 207 lbs.
Current BMI: 35'ish

**Image courtesy http://www.flickr.com/photos/rehvonwald/

Back to work tomorrow

I've gained several pounds since last monday. It doesn't help that I'm home all day and bored. I went to the grocery store yesterday at got snacks. Candy and cookies and chips. Yeah, so very nutritious. blech. I'm a little grouchy today because my sleep pattern is all messed up from being out of work for over a week, and I had to get up earlier today so it'll be easier to get up early tomorrow.

Anyway, just checking in. Don't feel like a big post right now. Maybe tomorrow.

Current weight: 217

Such Progress

Two pounds down this weekend. That's a good weekend if you ask me! Gotta stay on track and keep loosing about a pound a day so I can get under 200 in 18 days. That would be quite a feat considering that there are usually at least one or two days a week that I lose nothing. So I'll have to work my ass off to actually get that goal. But... 199 is worth it, right?

I just got back from shopping and dropping the BF off at work. Later today I need to take my daughter to the store to get some new shoes for school. I'd also like to pick up a new frying pan. I'm going to check Ross to see if there are any at a reasonable price.

Anyway, that's all I have to say for now, I'm off to watch a little tv then go to the store.

Current weight: 218 lbs

Cake is not conducive to weight loss.

I was hoping to be 228 lbs by today, but alas, yesterday was my birthday, and well... cake is not conducive to weight loss. I ate a whole normal slice and a scoop of ice cream. lol ... I had to force it down with water so I could finish it. Bad bad Angi. But in my defense, it was exactly the cake I wanted. It was soooo yummy.

The bad phase is over now, and I'm back to being good again. It's not like I even ate all that much yesterday anyway. I had a s.f. pudding for breakfast, half a cup of homemade soup for lunch, 2-3 pork rinds for a snack, the cake, and then about a tablespoon of BBQ beef and melted cheese for dinner. The cake couldn't have been that bad if that's all I ate. Really.

Of course, it could just be that I stalled out for a day. That often happens around this time of the week. I'm sure it'll drop back in a day or two. I'm going for a run today, well, a run/walk, to kick myself back into gear. I'm starting the couch to 5k today at lunch. That outta be fun. eh?


Current weight: 229 lbs.

Monday Madness!

Over the weekend I went to karaoke, and got stone drunk. It was great. I've been eating very little for the last week. Last night for dinner I had a single hot dog, no bun, and about 1/4 cup of mac-n-cheese. I had to stop twice to let my food go down before I ate some more. I finished the hot dog, but left some mac on my plate. For breakfast yesterday I had pudding, and for lunch I had 5 wholewheat ritz crackers with cajun crab spread on them. That's a fair sampling of how I've been eating.

For my exercise yesterday I cleaned out our fridge. Totally detailed it, removed the shelves and everything. 1 and a half hours of hard labor. lol

I'm wondering if I should be doing protein shakes again? At least every few days maybe. I had pudding for breakfast this morning too. I need to invest in some flavorless protein powder to add to my puddings. I have pork rinds for a snack, and a slim fast for lunch. I would have had that for breakfast, but it's frozen, so I have to wait.

I don't know what we're doing for dinner yet.

I weighed myself on the Wii this morning and had lost another 2 pounds, after loosing almost a pound the other day, that's about 3 pounds for the week. Good deal! Loving it. Hee hee. It might have been more were it not for the alcohol on Saturday, but whatever, I had fun.

It's not my official weigh day yet. Tomorrow. So maybe I'll lose some more by then.


Current weight: 230lbs.

Official Weigh In Day

Weighed in this morning. 2 weeks from the day after surgery, my official weigh in day, till I make it something different. Should I make it Monday? So it's exactly from when I got banded? Or leave it Tuesday, so it's from the first time I weighed myself after banding? It should probably be Sunday, the day before banding, but I didn't weigh myself that day, and they didn't weigh me the day of surgery.

Conundrum.

So Tuesday it is. For now. And back to my weight... I was down .2 of the pounds that I was up yesterday, so I'm almost back to 238. I've heard from other people that most go up a bit and then drop dramatically. I hope that's me! lol. The .2 brought me to exactly 239 lbs. Had I lost just .1 more pounds I would have been back at 238. That would have been good. I like that number. I would like 237 even better!

I was really good eating wise yesterday. I had 1/2 chicken breast for breakfast, with a couple bites of applesauce, and the same for lunch. For dinner I had about 1 1/2 cups of Turkey Pumpkin Chili, and a teaspoon of light sour cream to top part of it. Other than that it's been water, or decaf tea with Splenda, which I don't drink after meals. Oh, and my vitamins. Yum yum.

I need new goals for this week, which I should have set Monday, but I couldn't think of what I wanted them to be. I have now though, so here they are:

1. French, 20 mins per day.


2. Work out in the gym at least 2 times this week.


3. Walk 30 minutes each day I'm not in the gym.


4. Get to 235 lbs. by Sunday.

I think these are do-able. So wish me luck!

Current weight: 239 lbs.

That Funny Feeling

My weight is up by .4 lbs, which puts me back in the 239 pounds area, as of this morning. I was sad to break my losing streak, but not entirely surprised. Weekends are not good for me. I have a bit of a co-dependent thing with my boyfriend, and when he gets snacky, guess who also gets snacky? On top of that, I made mac-n-cheese at the request of my daughter, and ate some. I knew I shouldn't but I just couldn't help it!

I know it's only .4 pounds, but I'm supposed to be losing weight, not gaining it back!

The tree I saw on my walk today.

Needless to say, I was disappointed this morning. I'm sure it'll be back down soon though. I'm on the tail end of my "monthly issues" and I'm sure I'll drop a bit once I'm all done there. I also walked 40 minutes yesterday, and 40 minutes today. I plan to do it again the rest of this week too.

I remembered to bring my food for breakfast and lunch today, teriyaki chicken and apple sauce. (for both.. the chicken was leftovers)

When I was eating lunch today, I got one of those reminder jolts that I have something stopping me from eating. I got through with my chicken - protein first! - and started my applesauce. I got about 3 bites when I got this ... heavy feeling in my gut. I took one more bite and stopped. I only took that last bite because it was already half in my mouth when I felt the heaviness. It's a really good thing that I picked the smaller piece of chicken for my lunch, or I probably would have PB'd. lol
Which I haven't yet done, btw.



Current weight: 239 lbs.

Little Update

Good afternoon!!

Just a little update. Things are going well. Healing well. Went to see my surgeon Friday, and was cleared for regular foods, which I was kinda already doing anyway. lol

So I made my 239 goal yesterday, and as of this morning I'm 238 pounds!! Woohoo! After researching on my Wii Fit, looking back at my history since we had it, I actually got down to 238 last year in May not long after we got the Wii Fit, because we were playing it obsessively. So I am now officially as low as I was a year ago, only this time, instead of going back up after wards, this time I will continue going down. Yay!! This is SO exciting! OMG.

2 more pounds and I will be 20lbs. down from the day after surgery. So that's my next mini-goal... 236 lbs.


Current weight: 238lbs.

Just Short...

The question for the morning is; Did I meet my goals? hmm... lets see:

So as you already know, I did one set of "Squat/Shoulders/Sky". I never got a second one in because my legs hurt too much.

2 hours + of French yesterday!! C'est Magnefique!! (spelling?? lol)

Shakes were already made. I have a frozen one in my bag, thawing for lunch.

No 20 minute walk, was replaced by 30 minutes of Yoga!

Weight: Barely 240!

I lost .7 pounds this morning, which put me .2 pounds away from 239. I'm hoping that by tomorrow I will have lost that other .2 pounds to make it to 239. That will be SUPER exciting. I haven't seen the 230's in over 2 years!!

I have my surgery follow up this afternoon with Dr. Yarbrough, where he tells me it's ok to eat solid foods again. Though, I'm going to try to stick to the shakes till I make 235 lbs. That way I'm solidly in the 230's before I risk putting real food in my mouth every day.

I'm going to try baked chicken tomorrow. I know I've already done chicken, but the chicken I did was processed, deep fried and sauced. So although it went down ok, that doesn't mean that normal, baked and DRY will go down as well. I have a lemon pepper marinade that I'm going to cook it in. Hopefully that will help.

So, I'm not under 240 yet. That's ok, I still lost some weight. At least I'm not stalled out.


Current weight: 240 lbs

Holding Steady

How did I do on my goals yesterday?

I got in 1 set of "Squat/Shoulders/Sky"

I didn't get any French in. Just plain forgot.

I made enough shakes for today and tomorrow, and maybe a little leftover for Saturday.

I got in a 20 minute walk with my daughter. It was actually 25-30.

Still at 240, so I haven't gotten to 239 yet. No progress at all on that front.


So my legs are sore from the "Squat/Shoulders/Sky" yesterday, but I did manage to get one in already this morning. I just need one more to make my goals today. I had my shake this morning, like a good girl. Just 8 oz., as directed.

On my weight: Yesterday when I got home, I jumped on the Wii to see if I was down any, but unfortunately I was actually up 2 lbs. I guess that's what I get for weighing twice in a day. Naughty naughty. So I weighed in again this morning. That 2 lbs was gone, and I was back to the even 240 that I was before. That was a relief. I was so worried that that extra 2 would stick.

I'm going to work really hard to make sure my goals are met today. Also, I forgot my lunch. (half a can of chicken ranchero chili that I prepared in a dish to bring to work.) So I'm totally pissed at myself for that. I don't know if I want to go home and eat that or just get something here. Going home would be far cheaper, even with gas prices... I'll probably do that.



Current weight: 240 lbs.

No Loss Today

Well, I jumped on the Wii this morning, hoping that I didn't gain because I ate so much yesterday. Good news: No gain! Bad news: No loss.

I didn't have time yesterday morning to make my requisite shake, so I ate two over-medium eggs at the cafe downstairs instead. Then for lunch I had a 7-layer burrito with chicken (No tortilla and easy on the rice). As a snack I had half a banana and a strawberry. For dinner I had 6 tater tots and a scoop of turkey sloppy joe with about 1/4 oz of cheese sprinkled on. No bun. I feel like I ate a lot. I know I didn't really... compared to what I ate before surgery, this was nothing. Compared to the week post-op though, this was huge. I'm pretty sure that's why there was no loss. (It could also be the lack of #2 for three days, if you know what I mean.)

I guess I can't expect to lose every day, and at some point it's going to level out because I don't get filled for 5 more weeks, but still! I was on a pretty big high from having lost that 14 pounds. Maybe tomorrow I'll drop that pound to 239. That would be great!

I'm being pretty good today. I had a Banana Muscle Milk for breakfast - 25 grams of protein, baby! I have 4 strawberries in a bag for snacking in case I get peckish. And I will have soup for lunch. Hopefully I won't be starving when I get home this afternoon.

I'm keeping up with my water pretty well. I had at least 50 oz yesterday, and then a glass of tea. So far today I've had most of 20 oz, and will refill the bottle in a little bit as soon as this is gone, so by the time I leave here (work) today I will be at 40 oz.

I'm setting some goals for myself for the remaining part of the week. Lets call them "Self Improvement Goals". Here they are:

1. Two 5 minutes sets of "Squat/Shoulders/Sky" per day.


2. Review French words on Babbel.com 20 mins per day.


3. Make my shakes at night, for use the next day.


4. Walk for 20 minutes per day.


5. Hit the 239 lbs. (or below) mark on the scale!

Ok, well, that's all for now. Let's see how the rest of this week goes, if all goes well I'll put up new goals for next week.

Current weight: 240 lbs

Awesome Din-Din

Dinner. What an interesting time of the day! I'm supposed to still be on mushies, but it's a lot of work to put stuff into a food processor or blender after it's been cooked, and I like to eat dinner with my family. Last night the family was having these small bbq chicken bites (prepackaged) with mashed potatoes and cooked broccoli.
When it came time for me to plate up I got down one of those little salad plates that's about half the size of a regular plate, and added 1 chicken bite (my first since banding), a spoon of broccoli, and a spoon of potatoes. When comparing my plate to my family's plates there was a drastic difference. I found it quite amusing.

Out of the 4 of us, my son was the first to finish, then my boyfriend. My daughter is always slow, so it's to be expected. I was there grinding away at my one chicken piece still, having only had that and a couple bites of the other stuff. I was the very last person to get done, with the smallest amount eaten. Boy, was it tasty though. Just to be safe, all my chicken bites were about the size of the tip of my pinky finger. Then I mashed up that chicken in my mouth to a nice grainy paste.

It all went down fine. When I was done I leaned back in my seat and felt nice and full. A little over "comfortably full" but not enough to make me sick. Definitely far less than the Home Town Buffet feeling. (That, by the way, is how I judge too full, that feeling like I just went to Home Town Buffet and got my monies worth is way too full.)

This feeling is very exciting, and I'm happy that I'm feeling it. It makes me very happy to think how much this band is doing for me already, just in the week since I had surgery. I told my boyfriend that I felt like I'd had seconds of his size plate. That was how full I was. He laughed.

By the way, I lost another .7 lbs as of this morning. This puts me at 240 pounds!!! I am not yet looking at the something point something weights, because I'm losing so fast I'm just rounding to the current pound. This puts my loss at 14 pounds since last Monday!!!! That's just crazy. I'm hoping it'll be another pound and a half to put me at 239 by tomorrow, so cross your fingers for me. I'll be in the 230's if I make it!! Yipee!


Current weight: 240lbs.

Vacation!

About my diet since surgery. Once you leave the hospital it's the Stage 2 diet. That means that I have to have one shake a day, but the other two meals can be anything mushy or liquid. Like mashed potatoes, or strained soups or eggs. I have to admit I've cheated a little and had pasta and a few cooked vegetables. But I've chewed REALLY well, and only eaten really soft stuff. No meats or other hard to chew stuff.

My appetite has been coming back since about Friday, so it takes a bit more to get full than during the few days after surgery. Those days were crazy! I could only eat a couple teaspoons of something before I was full!

We went on a mini-vacation this last weekend as soon as I felt up to it. We left Saturday morning to Portland, went to the Oregon Zoo, and the Old Spaghetti factory (that's where I had the pasta...mmmmm). At the zoo we got to ride on an old fashioned steam train to Washington Park and back. It was so cool! By the time we caught the train my feet were throbbing from walking around the zoo. And it was so hot that day. About 90 degrees if I remember correctly. The Old Spaghetti factory was after the zoo, later in the day, for dinner.

Sunday we drove over to Astoria, went to the Astoria column and climbed up it... OMG so difficult it was 165 steps, but I made it! Then we spent the rest of the day driving down the coast from there on 101. We were going to drive all the way to Florence on 101, but traffic was horrendous. So we ended up cutting short and routing through from Newport to Corvallis, then on down i-5 to Springfield. We saw a bunch of neat stuff. It was a great trip.

As of this morning I'm down just under 3 more pounds from Saturday's weight. I'm sure the walking around the zoo, and the climbing that tower were helpful, to say the least. I am excited to say that if I keep loosing weight like this, I should be in the 230's by Friday. Cross your fingers for me!


Current weight: 241 lbs.

10 Pounds down!

So after surgery, I wasn't able to eat much. That's to be expected, from all the swelling and stuff. I got home and relaxed a bunch, and the first couple days I weighed myself, Tuesday, and Wednesday, I actually gained some weight. I was really expecting this because of all the "last meals" that I ate last week. I went a little crazy with all the foods I figured would be hard to eat after the band. I was also eating ice cream and other stuff that I shouldn't eat.

My last weigh in before banding was at 247 lbs, at the center to verify that I was on task. That was Tuesday of last week. This last Tuesday, the day I came home from the hospital, I weighed in at 256 lbs. The next day I'd gained another half pound or so. Like I said, I expected all this, because of what I ate, and all the swelling that I had from surgery. Oh, also because I hadn't pooped since Monday (TMI I know, but I want to make sure that I say everything here.)

Yesterday, Thursday, when I weighed myself I was down by a little over 6 lbs!! That was the entire amount that I'd gained from my little discretions. I thought at that point that I was back on track. That was just some loss from swelling and whatnot. So today when I weighed in I figured, 2 maybe 3 pounds... But I got a nice surprise when I saw over 5 pounds lost!! OMG. This is going faster than I thought. Being on stage 2, mushies, is really working out for me. So from my first day out of surgery weight, I've lost a total of about 11 lbs. (I wrote 10 in the title because I like even numbers... lol)



Current weight: 245lbs.